It's been a difficult fall and winter. I've been in a "place" in my head that's not what you'd call a good place and not real inspiring to write about...
I came to a place where there was a gnawing inside that I couldn't ignore any longer. I've felt it for a few years, slowly growing... but honestly... didn't truly recognize the source.
It starts and ends with me.
I'm a gypsy in more ways than one. Much interests me... but there's a problem there. Spread yourself in too many directions, and nada gets done. You run in circles with nothing being accomplished.
Well... spinning those circles I came to realize there were... are... parts of me I just can't leave behind. But also in this world, there's only so much of each of us to go around... and it's "THAT"... that I've been stewing over for months.
Which part of me at this late place in life do I focus on? Which part of me is the greater part? I have to cull out the lesser bits to focus on the greater... or lose it all...
Now... I'm a rider right? But what kind? Motorcycle? or Horse?
I've rode both the greater part of my life (Made my living horseback)... but the past six years... there've been no horses. It was THAT absence... that has been gnawing at my innards. Turns out to have been a wrong trail I turned down.
Motorcycles get inside you... Horses... even deeper. It rapidly goes back to that "If I have to explain it to you - You won't understand" bit of wisdom.
There's not enough of me to go around... so I have to choose. Where does my greatest passion lay?
... I have discovered... that it lays with Horses and so Back to Horse... is where I'm going.
To that end, I put my Raider up for sale way back in December... when I got back into Arizona for the winter... I was hoping that like, ripping a bandage off FAST to get the pain over with quick... it would sell fast.
It didn't... it Hasn't. and this turmoil in my head gets drug out week after week... month after month.
I've run ads online since before christmas. I'd not be so perplexed if people looked at the bike and decided against it... but I've had zero calls. That's as in... None. Not one... ugh! Not a soul has looked at the scooter... makes it real difficult to sell it.
That was an eventuality I'd not expected.
I can't mark it off to I've got her priced too high. It's been the lowest for that bike on craigslist by near $2000.
Guys say well keep it... and do both... To which I say; Re-read the parts above where I talk about "Only so much of me to go around." ... I can't spread my loyalties around like that I've discovered... It runs 'em too thin to give proper attention to either.
...or at this point... my finances... and I need the cash she represents to go the way I've chosen...
And deep inside me... I NEED to get back to Horse...
... and this lil' bit of purgatory drags on.
Brian
P.S. If you should know anybody interested in an '08 Yamaha Raider with 38,000 on the clock and a few extras for $6000... send 'em my way...
... Splitting the wind on a Motorcycle... Feeding my soul with the Healing power of the Open Road... following that twisting, Ribbon of Highway that leads me on...
7 comments:
Well, I guess I hope you sell it quick then, or find someone willing to trade their horse for it. Funny how life has a way of making a man make decisions he doesn't want to make.
Best of luck in getting back to horsing around.
Having sold my bike last fall, I know the feeling. I k ew it was the right thing to do but I still feel jealous pangs every time I see or hear a hike go by. Good luck with your sale!
Sorry to hear, both on the no buyers side and on having to choose between the two passions. I was real close to giving up the two wheel life, hardly rode at all since leaving Colorado a few years ago. It's s hard choice to cut that cord. Funny though how you can remember such exact details of past rides- better to have known and remember than never to have traveled those roads, I say.
I've been wondering how you were doing. Was thinking last week we hadn't seen a post in a bit.
Maybe with the spring people will start buying bikes again. Fingers crossed.
Hopefully you'll get back to horses soon. I haven't ridden since high school, but always enjoyed it.
I imagine in warm weather, it'll sell. Good to hear from you again, and don't be a stranger.
i gotta say..i was wondering if you had gone in the ditch and was dead. your blog has been an inspiration to me. good luck with what ever path you choose
Hey Brian will Ribbon of highway be replaced with "dusty Trails"? Wishing you much happiness on your NEXT chapter in life
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